Hotel Acceptable With Free Ethernet Access, Tokyo.
The Gigsters' Loud alarm woke me at 09.00 & I reluctantly entered the day. Somewhere on the planet it was 09.00, no doubt. Waking, I found myself reflecting on the sense of the presence of music onstage last night: of the intelligence within/behind the music that we were playing.
The only thing that sustains me on the road is the quality of performance. Good hotels make touring possible, but they are not the reason I am here. Good transportation makes this possible, but only gets me here. Playing with musicians of this caliber is also sustaining, and it's a joy to me that I am the only jerk in this band. Getting paid is something that I have never had a great deal of faith in anyway, as a long-term EG artist, and particularly given EG Management's policy for touring - EG got paid, the players didn't. After all, the players were promoting their record (on which EG also got paid) and that should have been sufficient. But, increasingly, to have our performances punctured and shot down on a regular basis has now become too much for me; and it hurts that those who do it are more likely supporters than antagonists.
I note also that the strongest responses to recent Crim shows are from young faces, those who are new to Crimson.
Also this morning: reflecting on the repercussions of actions, and how repercussions proliferate beyond our capacity to see & anticipate. Better then to act rightly: when we act rightly, we can handle the repercussions. Otherwise, we may find ourselves overwhelmed. A large part of this is the intent & motivation that give rise to the action. Where the intent is mischievous or malicious, even where an act is seemingly straightforward, a smell accompanies it that has greater effect than the surface act would seem to justify. This permits the English response of denial: what have I done? One possible answer might be: you lied while you looked me in the eyes & smiled. Another: jealousy was in your heart as you presented your helpful criticism. Another: you sought to establish your place in history while claiming to present a marketing strategy. And all these examples from Crimson history.
Also this morning: the power of imagination in our lives and how, in extreme forms, fantasy may lead us off-course. I have experience of fantasy & its power, on the inside & outside. A very small part of it is real, which gives the rest of the illusion/delusion its strength. The Orthodox might call this a strategy of The Great Deceiver, The Tempter, the Prince of Lies, and see fantasy being used as a device to hold us to this earth, and prevent us realising our destiny.
I have seen the power of imagination, where it moves into fantasy, extensively in my professional life, in Guitar Craft, and most powerfully in "the Work". So, what to do when it becomes apparent that someone with whom you are closely involved has moved into fantasy? What do you do when that fantastic projection is about to de-rail/spoil/unseat your own work?
In a training context, a bona fide teacher might let a fantasy run, and use it over a period of time as a teaching instrument. But a teacher is a large character, and has the capacity to see results & repercussions over a broad canvas, through a large present moment; and then pick up the tab at the end. The prime aim of the teacher is to guide the student towards what is real, what is true. A secondary aim is to safeguard the school or training.
In a professional context, repercussions proliferate rapidly & dangerously. Where the person locked in fantasy is in a position of responsibility, action needs to be taken swiftly: otherwise bankruptcy can follow very quickly. Conventionally, action is taken by a manager or employer. The prime aim here is to safeguard the undertaking; the secondary aim (depending upon the quality of the firm) is to ground the business partner/employee in as gentle a way as possible.
Amateur musicians often aspire, unrealistically, to become professional; and professional musicians to unrealistic acclaim & acknowledgement. Some rock stars, touched by the power of music when it comes to life in front of large numbers of people, believe themselves to be the originating power. Beginners in a practice often have "experiences" that convince them that they are special, perhaps even created uniquely by God (and part of this is true, which gives additional strength to the fantasy).
Challenging fantasy generates reaction in proportion to the strength with which the fantasy is held. In other words, look out. If any of this seems remote from daily life, or theoretical, look around - it is clearly not. Bumping up against each others' hopes, aspirations, aims, dreams - and utterly unrealistic, witless imaginary schemes - is pretty much daily stuff for anyone that does anything with anyone else; let alone in an area where the creative imagination is fundamental.
Where a good person is in fantasy, yet seeing that this will cause damage to myself/a common undertaking, a bringing-down-to-earth is necessary sooner-or-later; but this earthing can cause a few emotional bruises and, handled unkindly, even psychic damage.
This grounding call recently fell to me. I saw a good person move into imagination, saw the repercussions of this down the road & was not prepared to let the future be connected to that fantasy. So, seeing trouble coming that I was unable/not prepared to deal with at a later date, I decided to act. For the limited character that I am, my guiding principles were these:
once a decision is taken, better to act on that decision as soon as feasible, in a clean & straightforward fashion.
act rightly, and you will be able to deal with the repercussions.
"Acting rightly", to the degree that I was able, I knocked the fantasy on the head. Trusting in this, I trust to the repercussions.
The key to this is the intention & motivation that give rise to a decision, act or strategy. When we act intentionally, even with the best intentions, and call a person on their assumptions or behaviour, the impact can be considerable. In any case, our own assumptions & behaviour, unintentionally, will already have generated irritation & difficulties of which we are unaware. An excuse sometimes offered, for our own careless dealings with others, is that I have provided "opportunities" (i.e. difficulties) for another person to use in their own work. This is fundamentally dishonest. Dealings of this power & subtlety are only for the qualified; those qualified are small in number; and those small-in-number don't advertise.
On the guitar, I can give an exercise, know how & where it will (almost inevitably) go wrong, and know what is needed to correct the errors two-or-three years later; and then how to correct the (almost inevitable) subsequent set of errors three-or-four years after that. But the guitar is my speciality.
As Jamie Muir's postcard put it in 1972: all part of the rich tapestry of life.
Now, an e-flurry.
14.47
Reading accompanied by coffee in a local coffee shop & in the smoke-ridden hotel lobby cafĂ: Roger Scruton's The West And The Rest: Globalization And The Terrorist Threat (Continuum 2002) begun on the flight here.
From an e-mail to a pal --
sometimes i sense in your e-mails a quiet despair. this is an entirely reasonable response to our strange times, in my view, and is paralleled in my own professional life as a working player, much of which is a joyless exercise in futility. we persist, in faith, despite all evidence to the contrary that what we do might have value.
so, i feel i should present a report to you...
last night, in tokyo, while king crimson were playing, i had a sense of the creative intelligence that gave rise to the music "standing onstage" as it were: a large, open space within which the band were present. in a sense, this was "the music". more words would be an interpretation & a wittering-on, so best leave it there.
23.35
The Crims went to the Sigur Ros performance this evening. The theatre was a short walk away from the hotel.
"Begin with the possible and move gradually towards the impossible."
